How to Manage Stress
Feeling stressed? Well, it is time to “take control of your life”, says the expert, Angeline Chandran a Registered Counsellor from the Good Shepherd Counselling Services. Over the weekend on 26th August 2018, the stress management talk organized by the Family Life Ministry had 80 participants from NBVM and 3 participants from the Immaculate Conception Parish. The good news is stress is part of life and the important question here is “how to cope with it”.
The talk began with Rev. Fr. Dominic reading the Gospel of Mark 6: 30-32 “ The apostles rejoined Jesus and told him all they had done and taught, and he said to them ‘Come away to some lonely place all by yourselves and rest for a while’; for there were so many coming and going that there was no time for them to even to eat. So they went off in the boat to a lonely place where they could be by themselves”. Fr. Dom summed up that like the disciples, we too need to take time alone to pray and recuperate. He added that his remedy to alleviate stress is spend quiet time in prayer.
Angeline explained that stress is pressure or emotional tension, mental or physical or behavioural reaction to any perceived threats. It is the inability to cope and focus and where one may have lost hope. She drew an analogy of how holding a jar of bottle in the same position over a long period of time could cause pain. Similarly having stress for a long period of time can be damaging. Some stress can be positive (Eustress) that motivates us to keep going like a mum waking up early to prepare her kids for school. Bad stress (distress) is oppressive and overwhelming.
There are several causes of stress- from within which arises from personality (anxiousness, beliefs and attitude), health, financial woes, family, relationships, studies and work. Stress shows itself through following symptoms such as physical pain, negative emotions such as anger, anxiousness, behavioural patterns such nail biting or cognitive defects such as loss of concentration.
Some of the healthy ways of coping with stress is prayer, meditation, talking to someone trustworthy, exercising, and indulging in healthy hobbies and going on vacations. On the hand, the unhealthy way would be lashing out on others, addiction, self-harm, ignoring the source of stress or extreme behaviours such as over spending or underspending or excessive eating and sleeping. A group discussion on how to manage stress allowed participants opportunity to share their experiences.
To show how effective quiet time can be, Angeline, played some therapeutic music and asked the participants to close their eyes and relax. Many felt rejuvenated after that. She added that one should find solutions instead of giving up. It is also good to have a diary to be aware of trigger factors. One should also avoid stressful situations, alter the situation by speaking up your mind, adapt by changing our selves and accept things which are beyond our control like death.
Conclusion, “a diamond is just a piece of charcoal that handled stress exceptionally well”. She urged the participants that one should not be judgmental of people seeking counselling nor gossip. “Something therapeutic is happening” and as people of God we should encourage it. All those who wish to seek counselling may contact the Good Shepherd Counselling Services at 04-261-0273.